In my last post I advised that your child’s athletics may interfere with your own love for
God. I wrote: “When I have
advised parents that it is O.K. to miss some of their child’s sporting events,
some look at me as if I am advocating child abuse! But if your relationship
with God is the priority of your life won’t you occasionally need to miss a
child’s ballgame to attend a retreat or your small group Bible study? If you
always sacrifice those activities for your child’s athletics, what are you
teaching your child?” I also suggested that, at times, some parents try
to relive their childhood passions through their kids. When this happens, kids bear the burden of fulfilling a parents’
childhood dreams.
But some of you may have objected the way a good friend did
in a recent e-mail: When our 4
kids were growing up one of us.. usually both.. made a point to attend
their activities.. whether sports, music, theater or anything
else. It was not done to relive any childhood wishes that didn't
come true for us.. but because we loved them and wanted to support whatever
they chose to be a part of… So glad I did.. time flies by so quickly and
then they are gone on their own. . . . Supporting our children (and now our
grandchildren) is more important than almost anything (except a relationship
with Jesus).
I am
thankful that my friend and her husband supported their children’s activities.
This is one of the practical and necessary ways that we communicate our love
for our kids. And if a parent I knew was selfishly ignoring his children’s
activities I would quickly chide his choices. Parents, please be involved with
and support your children’s interests.
But
can those interests become too important? Life is a delicate balance. I am a
professor, a writer, a parent, a husband, a brother, a church
member, a neighbor, a citizen, etc., etc. And though my role as a parent is more important than my role as a neighbor, could my neighbor have a need that is more important than one of my child's activities? could one of my student's needs be more pressing than my child's choir concert? could my need for rest be more important than my child's ballgame? Loving God involves depending on Him to guide my discernment when callings come into conflict.
